A proposal that is biblical in grammar (Passover–memorial), patristically compatible (presence as participation), Reformationally intelligible (promise-centred), and Anabaptist-sensitive (discipleship/communal integrity).

Thesis

Covenantal Real Presence: In the Eucharist, the risen Christ is really present to his covenant people as covenant Lord—present to give what he promises (communion with himself and the benefits of his once-for-all self-offering), through the Spirit, by means of the appointed signs, as they are received in faith within a reconciled, obedient community.

This is “Real Presence” because Christ truly gives himself; it is “covenantal” because presence is promissory, relational, and enacted, not mechanically produced or metaphysically localised.

1. Biblical foundations: memorial as enacted covenant (zikk?rôn / anamnesis)

1. Passover (Exod 12:13–14) shows memorial as an enacted sign that God “sees” and to which God binds saving action.
2. Covenant remembrance is divine action (Gen 9:16; Exod 2:24).
3. “Do this in remembrance of me” should be heard within that memorial world: not “think about me,” but “keep covenant with me through this appointed enactment.”
4. Paul’s realism: participation (koin?nia) in body and blood (1 Cor 10:16–17) and the moral danger of eating “unworthily” (1 Cor 11) only make full sense if something more than mental recollection is occurring.

So, the Eucharist is memorial that participates in the once-for-all event without repeating it.

2. The nature of presence: personal, covenantal, pneumatic

Covenantal Real Presence specifies three things:

• personal: Christ is present as a living subject who acts, not as a static object to be analysed,
• covenantal: Christ is present in the mode of promise—“I am with you,” “given for you,” “for the forgiveness of sins”—a presence inseparable from his pledged self-giving
• pneumatic: the Spirit is the mode of communion; the Spirit does not replace Christ but unites believers to the risen Christ.

This resonates strongly with Calvin’s best instincts (real feeding, Spirit-mediated), while avoiding collapsing “spiritual” into “imaginary”.

3. The signs: neither empty symbols nor automatic mechanisms

In this proposal, bread and wine are:

• appointed covenant signs (visible words),
• effective means precisely because God has freely bound himself to act through them,
• not magical (no ex opere operato automatism),
• not merely illustrative (they truly mediate communion because Christ promises to meet his people there).

This is close to patristic “two realities” language (earthly and heavenly) without requiring later metaphysical definitions.

4. The sacrifice question: “memorial sacrifice” without repetition

Covenantal Real Presence speaks of “sacrifice” in a controlled way:

• the cross is once-for-all (no repetition, no re-immolation),
• the Eucharist is sacrificial memorial in the sense of covenantal representation: the church is brought into living contact with the benefits of the definitive sacrifice and responds with thanksgiving, self-offering, and proclamation,
• the Eucharist is therefore an access-meal and a covenant-renewal meal, not a second atonement.

This framing integrates naturally with Hebrews’ finality and with the biblical memorial pattern.

5. Ecclesial conditions: presence given to a people, not to isolated consumers

Here Anabaptist instincts become a strength rather than a liability:

• the Eucharist presupposes the one body (1 Cor 10:17),
• reconciliation is not optional decoration but part of the sacrament’s truth,
• the church must catechise and shepherd participation because the Supper is church-defining.

This does not make obedience the cause of presence, but it does treat obedience as the covenantal form of receiving presence truthfully.

6. Pastoral and liturgical implications

A church practicing Covenant Real Presence (or simply, Covenant Presence) will tend to:

• celebrate Communion more frequently (because it is constitutive, not occasional),
• teach it as promise + participation, not “moment of reflection”,
• include intentional space for reconciliation (silence, confession, peace, restitution where needed),
• explicitly connect the meal to mission and embodied discipleship,
• avoid language that implies repeated sacrifice or bare symbolism.

7. How this proposal negotiates the classic poles

• Against Zwinglian thin memorial: remembrance is enacted participation; Christ truly gives himself.
• Against crude localism / mechanistic presence: presence is covenantal and pneumatic, not spatialised.
• Against re-sacrifice: once-for-all finality is safeguarded; “sacrifice” language is memorial/representational.
• Against PSA reductionism: the Supper is not mere penalty-rehearsal but communion, proclamation, and covenant renewal—while affirming the gravity of sin and the necessity of the cross. It is the celebration of forensic standing in the context of renewed covenant participation in all that the cross has achieved.

Covenant Memorial

A Fresh Perspective on Real Presence

Copyright © 2026 Colin Dye 

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Scripture Translation

Unless otherwise indicated Scripture quotations are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version® (ESV®).

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Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Occasional emphasis has been added for clarity.

Grace and Forgiveness

Meditations on Psalm 51

This psalm doesn’t offer self-repair.
It offers mercy without denial — and truth without despair.

There are few biblical texts as familiar — and as easily misunderstood — as Psalm 51.
Prayed for centuries in private confession and public worship, its words can become so well known that they are no longer truly heard. Yet Psalm 51 was not written as a devotional comfort piece. It emerged from moral collapse, prophetic confrontation, chastening that was not bypassed, and mercy that proved strong enough to restore without denial.

Grace and Forgiveness: Meditations on Psalm 51 is a slow, serious listening to this
ancient prayer. Written with restraint and theological clarity, the book allows Psalm 51 to speak in its own voice — without being softened, hurried, or reshaped to fit modern expectations.

Rather than treating repentance sentimentally or forgiveness superficially, this book traces the psalm’s full moral and spiritual logic:

• forgiveness grounded in God’s righteous mercy
• discipline understood as fatherly care, not condemnation
• restoration that unfolds truthfully, not triumphantly
• usefulness recovered without illusion or entitlement

More than a symbol

Many evangelical churches today see the Lord’s Supper as just a symbolic act. The bread and wine help us remember what Jesus did on the cross, following his words: “Do this in remembrance of me.” This view, known as Memorialism, became popular during the Reformation in Switzerland — through leaders like Zwingli and Bullinger. They rejected the idea that the bread and wine actually become the body and blood of Christ.

Roman Catholics, Lutherans, and Orthodox churches believe in the Real Presence—that Christ is physically present in the Lord’s Supper. Even if they explain it differently, they all believe that Christ is actually present in the bread and wine.

John Calvin also believed in the Real Presence but offered a different way of explaining it. He didn’t think the bread and wine physically changed, but he did believe Christ is spiritually present when we receive them with faith. According to him, the experience is real and meaningful—not just a memory exercise. Believers feed on the body and blood of Christ as they are spiritually united with Jesus’ physical presence in heaven.

Although Memorialism is common in many churches today, some leaders are starting to question whether it’s enough. They’re asking, “Is the Lord’s Supper just about remembering, or is something more happening?”

Living Memorial

Jesus introduced the Lord’s Supper during the Jewish Passover—a meal that was all about remembering how God saved his people from Egypt. So when Jesus said, “Do this in remembrance of me,” it linked Israel with the Exodus and their living identity as the people of God. The Passover Feast was more than an act of remembrance. It pointed to the on-going activity of God.

The bread and wine point back to Jesus’ sacrifice, but they also carry forward his promises. This isn’t just about us remembering him—it’s also about trusting that God remembers us and responds when we approach him in faith.

The Lord’s Supper isn’t just a symbolic reminder. It’s a spiritual event. When we take part sincerely, it becomes a means by which God fulfils his promises and confirms his grace in our lives.

Spiritual Experience

The Lord’s Supper is a multi-layered spiritual experience. It works simultaneously in three
directions:

1. Inward, it helps us focus our hearts on Jesus. As we remember his sacrifice, the Holy
   Spirit draws us closer to God. We feel his love and peace. It builds our faith and trust
   in him.
2. Outward, it strengthens our connection with other believers. We’re reminded that
   we’re one family, united in Christ. As we share in the meal, we grow in love and
   fellowship.
3. Upward, we commune with God. It’s not just us reaching for him—he also draws
   near to us. As we worship and give thanks, he blesses us through the bread and wine,
   bringing us more deeply into all that is represented on the Table.

So yes, we remember Christ—but God is also doing something. The Lord’s Supper is a
powerful moment where heaven touches earth. It’s not just symbolic—it’s spiritual,
relational, and deeply real.

One of the greatest barriers to the revival of the Church in Britain, Europe and other parts of the world today is the wrong concept of ‘church’ held by many. In Parts Three and Four of this book, we examined the meaning of two important words the New Testament uses to describe the Church. The Bible teaching is clear, but erroneous ideas are so deeply embedded in our minds, and so much a part of our traditional experience of church, that we find it very difficult to understand and apply this teaching. Jesus’ words about our traditions emptying God’s Word of its power in Matthew 15:1-10, are never more relevant than when we think about church today. Through our wrong concepts of church, we limit our effectiveness and hinder our ability to build strong and effective churches today.

Many people refer to such concepts as ‘local church,’ ‘national church’ or ‘denominational church,’ but, as we saw in Part Three, rarely do these concepts carry the true biblical meaning of ‘church.’

Sword of the Spirit Series: Glory in the Church by Colin Dye

We have seen that the New Testament uses the word ‘church’ in three main ways:

To describe all believers both on earth and in heaven – the universal Church
To describe the household church – the community church
To refer to believers of a specific city or locality – the city church.

Each of these expressions of church is important and must have a place in our thinking and practice today. The universal Church is a reminder that there is only one true Church and Body of Christ, which consists of all believers of all history. This will only be fully manifested when all God’s people will be gathered together in heaven. It is a reminder that we all belong to each other and to the Lord.

The community church is witnessed to in Scripture in only a handful of verses such as Romans 16:5; 1 Corinthians 16:19 & Philemon 2, and yet, it is an extremely important part of our understanding and expression of church. The household in the society of New Testament times was not the same as the typical nuclear family household of today. It was a thriving community, almost a village in itself. It is clear from this that God intends church to operate fully at every level of society penetrating into even the smallest of communities.

This community understanding of church has some obvious advantages. Close-knit relationships and a sense of belonging flourish through this emphasis on local, people group communities. Both rural villages and urban communities, found in their specific locality within large cities, must have credible expressions of church at their level of community.

What we describe as ‘local churches’ today resembles more closely these community churches (household churches) of the New Testament. It is where we are strong today. But, our weakness lies in seeking to express everything that the Bible says about church through these community-style churches. The community church without the New Testament expression of the city church is but a fragmented expression of what the Bible reveals about church. As we described in Part Three, the city church of the New Testament consisted of many of these localised, community churches expressing themselves as the church of that city or area.

THE MYTH OF INDEPENDENCE

We also saw in Part Three that what we commonly call a ‘local church’ today is inconsistent with the revelation of the New Testament. The local churches of the New Testament (such as the churches of Jerusalem, Ephesus, Corinth and Antioch) were expressions of the body of Christ in a city or area. They were not single, independent congregations but more like a network of congregations functioning interdependently as one church. This is the principle underlying the concept of church networks. You cannot have an independent local congregation any more than you can have an independent hand or foot. Together, they form one body.

The choice in the New Testament is never between local congregations or city-wide churches, between small or large – but all these things should be working together with each element in its proper place. This is the only way we can have a real spiritual impact on our towns, cities and nations.

What most people speak of a ‘local church’ today, they have in mind a single congregation with a pastor, a leadership team, a building to meet in, and a local area to claim as its own. But, this leads to a serious departure from the New Testament when people see this traditional model of the ‘local church’ as the only real and legitimate expression of church today. Consequently, they build small, isolated and narrow-focussed congregations claiming to be the body of Christ in their area. They pay little or no attention to their brothers and sisters in other ‘local churches’ except for a few pulpit courtesies, some token fraternal activities and perhaps also their denominational affiliation. Apart from these things, they see themselves as ‘independent churches’ holding a direct relationship with the government of Christ and claiming full sovereignty as ‘local churches’. Few attitudes can be fracturing the body of Christ more than this. Real unity will only be seen when all the congregations of a town or city see themselves as part of the same body of Christ.

THE NETWORK CHURCH

The network church concept rejects the narrow, inward-looking tendency of so many small so-called ‘local churches’ we see today with their ‘village mentality’. These churches tend to be small, parochial and inwardly focussed. Network churches, on the other hand, will seek to grow to become many thousands of people, with a city-wide and expansive mentality and will be characterised by an outward focus.

Local churches today tend to be mono-cultural, but the network church will incorporate all the various cultural, racial, language and people groupings often found in today’s society and express these through a multicultural approach to church.

The village-minded church is usually strong on fellowship and pastoral care and is often led by a one or (at the most) a two-fold ministry – that of the pastor-teacher. But, the network church upholds the five-fold ministry seeing the importance of the apostolic and prophetic in the government of the church.

The village-minded church sees itself as an independent whole rather than one part of the whole, needing to be integrated into the bigger picture of the network church. On the other hand, the network church consists of interdependent parts working together in connection with the whole. The network church philosophy is an inclusive and expansive approach to church which seeks to recognise all expressions of the Body of Christ in the city or locality.

THE MEGA CHURCH

From about the 1980’s, beginning in North America, a new form of church began to be seen which was, in part, a reaction against the ‘local, village church’ approach. The ‘mega church’ phenomenon took America by storm as churches of many thousands began to be seen in one major city after another.

But these churches didn’t really express church in the fullness of the New Testament revelation. The difference was simply in the size and influence of the particular church in question. It still was about ‘your church’ and ‘my church’ but the difference was simply that mega churches were bigger than most local, village-type churches. The mega churches of the 1980’s grew big through ‘church growth’ principles rooted more in sociology than genuine spirituality. Characteristically, they were headed up by high-powered, charismatic leaders who had great management skills and were backed by tightly-controlled leadership teams – often consisting of family members. The philosophy was ‘big is beautiful’ and all that seemed to matter was the growth of their church. Everything was done with the single aim of furthering this goal. It was a ‘no-holds-barred’ approach to church growth.

The fact that at the end of the 1980’s there were no more Christians in the USA than at the beginning, showed that the mega church phenomenon was more successful in drawing from the pool of existing believers than it was about the real work of Christ: making, maturing and mobilising new disciples for the Master.

Now in the 21st Century, we must be concerned not just to see churches grow, but also to ensure that every Christian is fully trained, equipped and mobilised. We have witnessed in recent decades the phenomenon of fast-growing churches building their numbers by competing with other churches through high-profile speakers, popular sermon topics and famous Christian ‘entertainers’. But our concern should be for genuine New Testament Christianity, which has much more to do with high-cost discipleship than the promotion of crowd-pulling programmes or personalities. The network church concept is best described as building ‘meta churches’ and not the traditional mega church of recent years.

THE META CHURCH

A ‘meta church’ is also a church of many thousands but shaped by a different philosophy of church from the mega church we have been describing. A meta church has an integrated approach to church which expresses itself through a network of many cells, congregations and ministries which enables the whole body to function fully.

In the same way we compared and contrasted the village church and the network church approaches, we can also highlight the differences between the mega church and meta church. The mega church usually has a mono-structural organisation, with all departments and ministries of the church relating directly to the senior leader through line managers. The meta church, on the other hand, is a network structure of churches, cells and ministries and has a releasing rather than a regulating approach to leadership. Consequently it has a more open and less managerial style of church government.

Mega churches see mobilisation consisting of members serving the programme of the church, but meta churches see service as the programme of the church. The emphasis of a mega church is on the ‘big building’ where everything of real significance takes place. The meta church, however, emphasises the need for the members to be the church wherever they are and buildings are merely a means to that end.

Meta churches put people before programmes and this is most evident in the cells. The cells are not just part of the programme of the church, but they are where the members are trained, equipped and released for the work of the church. The meta church upholds an every member ministry and sees the leadership’s role as primarily to equip the saints for the work of the ministry – making, maturing and mobilising disciples, according to Matthew’s Gospel chapter 28.

Meta churches understand mobilisation to be preparing God’s people for mission. The meta church approach is a discipleship approach to church and is based on servanthood. Mega church strategies can at times foster a competitive consumer approach to Christianity. Following the motto, ‘bigger is better’, mega churches can often appear as if their ultimate goal is merely to grow bigger rather than to produce disciples and to release people into the ministry of Christ.

Mega churches are usually anti-denominational with very few of them working within traditional denominational structures. Their sheer size can breed a spirit of superiority and independence. But those involved in meta churches understand the principle of networking and can easily extend that principle in order to embrace national and international networks.

Network churches hold the balance between central direction and local initiative. They enjoy the fact that they are both big and yet honeycombed into a myriad of different components – cells, congregations and ministries – through which people can be pastored, nurtured and mobilised within the context of a sense of real belonging but, at the same time, stand with the thousands in the great convocations and celebrations in the mass meetings. However, most important of all, network churches prize and value every individual member who is not merely a ‘pew-warmer’ or ‘sermon-fodder’, but a person with powerful potential. Network churches see their role as bringing out that potential and releasing it in the power of Christ to see his Great Commission fulfilled.

All these differences – between village-type churches and city churches, and between mega churches and meta churches – have helped us understand how the Lord wants churches to organise themselves and to grow as credible witnesses to Christ. This form of church expression could become an effective common model for church in the 21st Century.

THE STRENGTH OF NETWORKING
Christians are surely stronger when they stand and work together. This means being tolerant of the different doctrinal emphases found outside their own particular group as well as providing a loving defence of the essential fundamental doctrines of the faith found in the Bible. There can be no real unity based on compromising these foundational truths. We deal with this principle in more detail in Part Thirteen in this book.

The promise of Psalm 133 is given to brothers dwelling together in unity and we are told that this is where ‘the Lord commands the blessing.’ This promise should encourage every single Christian church, leader and ministry to consider the importance of networking. God never intended that we should ‘go it alone’ or that we should faction ourselves off from the rest of the body of Christ. Church networks are an important way of overcoming the destructive independent tendencies that lie at the root of fallen sinful nature. Separatist attitudes should never be allowed to enter the life of the Church. Our task is too urgent and the world is too lost. We simply must demonstrate to the nations the reality of a united body of Christ present and active in our locality, our nation and across the nations of the world.

NETWORK CHURCHES TODAY
In applying the New Testament networking principle, we must be clear that it is not possible to turn the clock back to New Testament times. 2,000 years of Church history have left us with more than 6,000 denominations, with many other independent church groups, streams and traditions in existence today. But if Jesus’ prayer for unity in John 17 is to be answered, each church group must see themselves as part of the greater whole – members of Christ’s body and not independent units separated from other church groups.

One way of doing this is through networking. A network is a real and tangible expression of interdependence and interconnectedness. Churches can network locally and nationally and can also be part of denominational and inter-denominational networks. At the heart of the network philosophy lie the principles of humility and acceptance. That is, the willingness to see that ‘our group’ is not the totality of the body of Christ on earth, and that we are all inter-connected parts of the greater whole. In short, we need each other. As John puts it in 1 John 1:3, ‘Our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son, Jesus Christ.’ This universal fellowship must necessarily involve partnership in the common vision to make Christ known to the world. Networks can operate both formally and informally, and can be both non-governmental and governmental in structure.

Non-governmental networks include both informal and formal network structures which honour the identity and integrity of local churches, while providing the framework for wider consultation, planning, action and vision.

Network churches are governmental structures and normally seek to develop all the characteristics of a network church within a city or a geographical region. It is interesting to note that the New Testament never uses the word ‘church’ in a national or international context. While national and international networks may be helpful in giving teaching, encouragement and apostolic direction to local churches, they should never become their governing authority. The network church, however, will have a governmental structure within its own city or region. In a network church:

The parts will be formally constituted to form an expression of a city or a regional church operating according to the network principle

They will usually be linked to apostolic leadership which gives shape and direction to the whole
The leadership will be drawn from each constituent part incorporating the five-fold ministry of Ephesians 4:11
They will embrace expressions of ekklesia at every level, from the twos and threes of companionship groups, to the convocation gatherings of the whole network church

The network church will itself form links with other groups and churches both in their area and beyond, expressing their full unity in Christ.

Building church networks today according to the meta church model is as desirable as it is necessary. However, we must never underestimate the challenge and the cost involved in following this path. For the most part, this involves laying aside completely the traditional models of church which are being followed without question in so many places today. The following principles serve as a summary of the principles of network churches and present the challenge of the Holy Spirit to the churches of today:

Absolute submission to Christ as Head of the Church and the willingness to function, as members of his body, solely according to his direction

Resisting the traditional church leadership model of ‘pastor-teacher’ and accepting the five-fold ministry in the leadership and direction of the whole network church

Rejecting the ministry as a profession or a career for some who do the work of Christ on behalf of the members of his body

Accepting the principle that every member is a worker and providing the structure in which this principle can flourish

Seeing the Church as more than Sunday services but as an on-going, day-by-day permanent relationship expressed in seven-day-a-week service to the Master in the place, profession and situation in life he has placed you

Dying to the egoism of personal kingdom-building and laying your gifts at the feet of the Master in the real work of the kingdom of God, which is making, maturing and mobilising disciples

Building church through the cells as the miniature engine-rooms of the body of Christ

Working in a spirit of interconnectedness and renouncing all aspects of independence in relation to membership and service in the body of Christ.

Only as we all take up these principles and work together in partnership with the Holy Spirit will we see the kind of effective Church emerge on the earth in advance of the Second Coming of Christ which we describe in the next chapter, the final Part of this book.

Pastor John Harris of Orlando, Florida, was welcomed into the gates of heaven on January 31, 2025, surrounded by his family and close friends. He was 82.

A proud Welshman, he was born to Richard and Dulcie Harris on March 5, 1942, and was raised in Newbridge, Wales alongside his sisters Rhyanon and Anita. He attended Newbridge School before going to work in the coal mines when he graduated at age 15. He served in the Royal Air Force from 1958 to 1964, during which time he met the love of his life, Dawn Mildred Harris (nee Shaw), to whom he was married for 60 years.

He gave his life to Christ at the age of 16 and was called to ministry in his late 20s, choosing to leave a successful career in insurance to answer God’s calling on his life. John spent the next decade ministering as a pastor at Kensington Temple and working with Life For the World Trust, a recovery ministry housed in a 50-room 17th century estate. He eventually served as the head of Pye Barn Trust, also a drug rehabilitation ministry, where Dawn served by his side.

In the early 1980s John started working with Chuck Colson’s Prison Fellowship and moved back to Portsmouth in the south of England, where he also served on staff at a local church. In 1984, he and his dear friend Terry Wiseman founded Staffwise to connect contractors with manufacturers, and in 1988 they brought Staffwise USA to Orlando, where he would find his second home.

He became actively involved in the ministry at First Baptist Church Orlando and would go on to join the staff as men’s minister in the early 1990s. He would later serve Downtown Baptist Church alongside his friend Jim Henry as associate pastor, overseeing senior adults and pastoral care, and served a similar role in the last years of his life at First Baptist Church Winter Garden. Throughout all his years of ministry, Dawn was his faithful partner and biggest supporter.

John was a man of immense faith, and he was deeply committed to the ministry of prayer. He remained involved in various ministries throughout his life, including Bridges International, a drug treatment program, and New Missions, which works to plant churches and schools in Haiti and the Dominican Republic. He went on numerous mission trips throughout his life, including to Kenya and the Philippines.

An avid golfer, he enjoyed many years as a member at the Bay Hill Club. He and Dawn were proud to become American citizens in 2009. He loved traveling Europe and trips to his cabin in Georgia, fine food, and being with his friends and family. Of all his many accomplishments, nothing made him prouder than his role as a husband, father, and grandfather.

John is preceded in death by his parents and his sister, Rhyanon. He is survived by his wife, Dawn; his children, Rebecca (Simon) Wallis and Matthew Harris; his grandchildren, Jonathan, Olivia, Isabella, and Emma; and his sister, Anita (Peter) Blanchett. 

TRIBUTE FROM COLIN DYE

Former Senior Minister Kensington Temple, Notting Hill, London, UK (1991-2021).

Former staff member The Chase, Drug Rehabilitation Centre, Clapham, London, UK (1977 – 1979).

It is hard to overstate the impact that Richard John Harris and his wife Dawn have had on my life. Known to us simply as John Harris he was a true Barnabas, a consoler and encourager, a man of genuine compassion and strength. He was Welsh (never to be confused with an Englishman) and he carried the typical passion of the Welsh into everything he did, not the least, passion for the Welsh national rugby team! 

John and Dawn gave me my first ministry position as a team member in The Chase, a Christian Drug and Alcohol Rehabilitation Ministry. I was fresh out of Theological College, naïve and wet behind the ears, with no ministry experience to speak of, but John took a chance on me. Together, we saw scores of young people find Christ as Saviour and permanently delivered from drug and alcohol addictions and other social problems.

While working with John and Dawn, I met and married my wife Amanda. They took charge of our wedding and even gave us a place to stay for our honeymoon. It is wonderful to have people believe in you and help you make a start in life, in marriage and in ministry. John was just that kind of person.

My abiding memories of John will be his open, generous and large-hearted approach to people in desperate need. Whether it be the homeless, the addicted or those in prison. But he was no man’s fool. He was firm, even adamant when necessary, and yet was always fair, knowing when to be gentle. In whatever role he was fulfilling at heart he was a pastor. Gifted with people, he had top grade communication skills and a keen insight into the human condition. He was outstanding in applying practical wisdom to people with problems, and they came from far and wide to seek his advice and counsel.

Above all, John was a lover of Christ and his gospel. He never lost an opportunity to share God’s love with those he met. We will miss him greatly. A dear colleague, trusted friend and advisor. Meeting him and Dawn recently in London, together with my wife Amanda, John was as interested as ever in what we were now doing for the Lord, offering his on-going support and encouragement.

Our deepest condolences of course go to Dawn, to Rebecca and to Matthew and to all John’s friends and family. May the peace and presence of Jesus be with us all.

Colin and Amanda Dye

London, February 2025

Course Resources

• Download Lecture Notes 1 – 6
• Watch Lectures 1 – 3

My previous blog When Leaders Are Too Empathic examined what happens when leaders take empathy too far. Now, I ask, ‘What do empaths and narcissists have in common?’

What if I told you that narcissistic behaviour and exaggerated empathy are merely different forms of the same root problem? On the surface, this seems highly unlikely, even impossible. Empaths are kind, narcissists are not. Empaths care deeply about the predicament of others, narcissists care only in order to further their personal ambitions. Empaths are yielding, narcissists are dominating.

Narcissism in its developed forms (such as Narcissistic Personality Disorder), has many causes. The same could be said for those who are excessively empathic. Psychologists are still figuring it out. But, as is often the case, the fruit reveals the root.

Narcissists present as confident persons – too confident in fact. They see themselves as highly competent and intelligent people, vastly superior to others. They are quick-witted, always ready with a cutting retort or a gas-lighting response. Their instant responses are effective in wrong-footing their opponents and demolishing those who are less ruthless, more self-reflective and just not so nasty.

Highly-developed empaths, on the other hand, lack confidence and are inclined to give others the benefit of the doubt to the detriment of themselves. What others say is more important than their own opinions. All this makes those with strong empathic traits easy prey for narcissistic snares.
Take a look at the following conversation between a narcissist and an empath in a conflict situation.

NARCISSCIST – “What you’re saying is just wrong. You’re accusations are false.”
EMPATH – “I’m not accusing you. I’m just saying that you’re actions seem to me to be unreasonable.”
NARCISSCIST – “I’m not responsible for what you’re thinking. That’s down to you.”

What is happening here? The empath is trying to confront unacceptable behaviour coming from the narcissist. The response is not fair or rational. The narcissist is right and no other version of events is worth considering.

The empath is being gentle and reasonable. But, rather than responding in an equally reasonable way, the narcissist exploits this as a weakness. The narcissist has the facts and cannot be contradicted. Any other point of view is just subjective opinion. After all, the narcissist can never be wrong. To be wrong is to risk an existential crisis. That’s why narcissists must win every argument and are totally unscrupulous in debate. Those who threaten their supremacy are immediately repudiated and their arguments scornfully dismissed.

Narcissists have a wide range of other ready-made and equally gas-lighting responses. What’s more, they relish interaction with empaths. They view them as psychological snack food, a cheap source of energy for an instant ego boost.

Above-the-surface we observe two entirely different patterns of behaviour coming from two distinctive personalities. But when we look more deeply, we begin to see a striking similarity.

The roots of both narcissistic and exaggerated empathic behaviours are exactly the same. It has to do with fear. The deeply-held fear or suspicion of being personally unlovable and/or incompetent. How this fundamental fear is dealt with practically, determines either narcissistic or empathic patterns of behaviour. At both ends of the spectrum we find people with serious relational problems.

The empath’s fear of having no real worth as a person leads to a life of excessive niceness and consideration of others. He or she is trying to find self-worth by being affirmed by others. On the other hand, the narcissist deals with the same fear by hiding behind a bold exterior front framed by excessive self-confidence and self-belief. The fear is denied and therefore never faced.

Both narcissism and excessive empathy are learned strategies of psychological compensation, never dealing with the fundamental fear of lack of self-worth.

We all have the same propensity to love and defend our ‘self-life’. This is obvious in narcissism. But the irony is that a person who exhibits excessive empathy may be as self-obsessed as the proverbial narcissist.

This presents particular problems for leaders in a church setting. How do we deal with the problem of narcissism in the pulpit? How do we help those on the other side of the coin who are slaves of niceness?

Self-evidently, we must be on our guard against narcissism. This form of ambition, not to mention ruthlessness, often leads to outward success, provided the public presentations skillfully cover the real personality lurking beneath. But not all successful church leaders are of the narcissistic type. Many advance by being empathic and shining as beacons of compassion, despite the underlying selfish motivation.

A person who exhibits excessive empathy may be as self-obsessed as the proverbial narcissist.

Tackling these problems in church leadership begins with selection and training, which must be based in radical discipleship. I contend that more inner work is needed from the very beginning of the discipleship process. It calls for insightful analysis and healthy soul-searching in the context of a biblical understanding of human personality.

Jesus, the supreme wisdom teacher in the Bible says,

“Whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it” (Luke 9:24, ESV).

Jesus calls his followers to a God-centred rather than a self-centred orientation in life. It can only happen from the inside out, from the transformation of our inner selves. Quite simply, we must lose our old selves and embrace our new selves, the selves we were originally created to be, which have now been recreated in Christ. All the ethical requirements of New Testament Christianity depend on this prior act of God’s inner recreation. Working this out in personality growth and behavioural change is a life-long agenda, but it begins the day we yield to Christ as Saviour and Lord.

Both narcissists and empaths need to renounce the self in a way they have never done before. Superficial conversion does not reach as deep as that, but this is where everything begins. We face the fact that we can do nothing to deserve God’s love or merit his acceptance. Rather than finding ways of compensating for this realisation, we must flee to Christ in whose eyes we are people of inestimable value and worth and, as new creations in Christ, empowered to live impactful lives. These biblical revelations must become deeply lodged in our hearts in life-changing and personality-transforming ways.

This does not mean we live without struggles. Profound personality issues are not easily resolved. But, once we see ourselves in Christ, we overcome our fear and can begin to reflect this reality beginning first with how we see God, then how we see ourselves and, finally, how we see others. We are set free from self-obsession and are ready to face life without the self aggrandisement of a narcissist or the self-suffocation that comes through adopting a life of exaggerated empathy.

Church Matters Series

2024 PROPHETIC POINTERS
At the beginning of 2023 I posted some prophetic pointers, Navigating 2023. I now offer some thoughts and insights which may be suggestive of the year ahead.

In January 2023 I wrote:

God is shaking the nations so that his kingdom will manifest. God’s kingdom cannot be shaken. It is our one stability in an unstable world. The forces of Chaos will not overcome God’s people.

We certainly saw the forces of Chaos at work in 2023. “Chaos” became the go-to word for journalists reporting on national and global affairs. God was at work permitting Chaos, partially in judgement, but also in grace. He allows chaos to manifest to show his displeasure toward sin and the inevitable results of human rebellion. The eruption of Chaos challenges every earthly society and system of government in order that the nations might seek the Kingdom of God, the only Kingdom that cannot be shaken.

We are now in a time of grave international conflict. The Russian war in Ukraine continues to rage. The despicable Hamas attack on Israel of 10/7 in 2023 provoked the Israel-Gaza war. Both these conflicts will continue to play out in 2024. The global geo-political and geo-spiritual implications of these wars remains to be seen. International pressure coupled with high level diplomacy no doubt will eventually bring some form of peace, but the world will be a different place. Further eruptions and escalation of conflict appear likely. The spiritual forces behind the eruption of hostilities will not rest.

Behind the disruption lie dark spiritual powers intent on opposing God’s original plan, his Eden project. God’s plan is to bring all things into conformity to his nature and will, fully manifesting his glory on earth as in heaven. Ultimately, he will recreate humanity and the entire cosmos bringing us back to Eden, the original creation plan. In the meantime, God’s mandate to Adam and Eve to be fruitful and multiply and to spread the conditions of Eden to the whole earth, has never been rescinded. We fulfil this mandate today by praying, preaching, and reaching out to the lost and hurting, by living our lives in line with God’s will.

The global community of Christian believers is made of up of both Jews and Gentiles united in Christ. We are the only beacon of ultimate hope in a lost, confused and increasingly violent world. But we must rise up and fearlessly live for God, passionately cling to him and uncompromisingly proclaim the truth of Jesus Christ to the nations.

The conditions of war create both challenges and opportunities for the gospel. Reports are coming in from Gaza that suggest some Palestinians are turning away from Islam, disillusioned by harsh treatment under Hamas. Christian war aid and support for the Jewish people has been a welcome contrast to increasing antisemitism in the West. These open doors of opportunity for the gospel. But that is not the whole story. Islamic fundamentalism is also rising, spurred on by the perception that not just terrorism, but Islam itself is under attack. New barriers to the gospel are evident as both Jews and Muslims feel the war in Gaza presents an existential threat.

Israelis, whose close neighbours are committed to the extinction of the State of Israel find it difficult to accept the Christian message. Attempts to convert them appear to be yet another attack on their Jewish identity. I suspect that alongside the opportunities for the gospel in the Middle East, we will encounter both Jews and Muslims whose hearts have been hardened by recent events. The Palestinian/Islamic narrative is increasingly accepted by many in the West. It is going to become harder to present Christ to both Western and Middle Eastern nations. Islam is not just opposed to Jews but is also hostile to Christians. This will become even more clear in the weeks and months that lie ahead.

But the good news is that the message of the New Covenant, originally promised by God for Israel, also includes the Gentiles. Jews and Muslims, together with those of all religions, and none, are universally invited to know God and to touch his glory in the person of Christ. Gospel fullness will eventually include both Israel and all nations. This is the broader prophetic context in which we should discern what is taking place now and what will unfold in the year ahead.

Empathy is a good thing – the capacity to see and understand the perspective of another person. That is something I, for one, would like to see in a Christian leader. I would like those who consider themselves to be leaders and who profess to be carers of my spiritual life and custodians of my spiritual gifts, to at the very least to be empathic people. Before they make any decisions or issue any pronouncements about me, I would like them to have spent time to understand me, to have first enquired and then imagined what it was to walk even a couple of miles in my shoes. This kind of empathy is always good, even if it may, from time to time, lead to painful correction or tough love.

Empathy and compassion are closely-linked, but they are not the same. Compassion is far stronger than empathy. It drives you to do something about the suffering of another. Compassion is empathy plus wise practical action and it pulls no punches.

I’m sure all will agree that empathy and compassion are basic requirements of spiritual leaders, and ought also to be the aspiration of all decent human beings.

But there is another dimension to this. Can empathy be carried too far? In my experience and observation of church life over the last 5 decades, the answer is, yes. Let me give you some examples.

• When it causes burnout
  Leaders who are overly empathic tend to give out and keep giving out until there’s nothing left to give. They run out of resources – emotional and otherwise. An exaggerated sense of empathy can lead to ‘saviour syndrome’, the belief that it all depends on you. Neglect of yourself, your family and alone time with God leads to a tragic exhaustion of personal resources. Tragic because the energy you expend on others is a renewable resource, if you know how to pace yourself. The priority of self-care is highlighted every time you watch the airline crew give the safety demonstration. They always point out you must don your own oxygen mask before attempting to help others with theirs.
• When it leads to loss of individual identity
  Many leaders who overdo empathy soon find their identity enmeshed in their ministry. Your identity is what you bring to ministry. Ministry can never be the source of your identity. Get this wrong and the otherwise admirable quality of your empathy will rob you of the clarity or presence of mind you need to lead others. The ability to take a firm stand for what you believe and to act decisively in the best interests of those you serve.

  End up there, and you will have lost your ability to do any real or lasting good to anyone, including yourself.

• When it traps you into abusive relationships
  Self-absorbed, narcissistic and abusive people lock onto super empathic leaders and use them as fodder for their selfish egos. There is a growing awareness of the phenomenon of spiritual abuse directed against church members, but we ought to recognise that members can also abuse their spiritual leaders. An over-empathic leader can easily succumb to manipulative demands, be battered by cruel criticism and be run into the ground by the unrealistic expectations of some of their members. I can bring to mind several horrendous cases where ministries have been shipwrecked on the rocks of membership cruelty, directed not just to themselves but, more painfully, also to their families.
• When it re-enforces irresponsible behaviour
  If empathic leaders do not check their desire always to please those whom they serve, they can end up enabling the very behaviour they are supposed to confront and correct. We are always to bind up the broken-hearted and to give attention to the weak and the hurting. But this does not mean that as leaders we give into to every demand people make on us. There comes a time when we can no longer absolve people of their responsibility to correct their own behaviour and discipline themselves into the ways that lead to their own freedom.

So much for the problems caused by taking empathy too far. What about some solutions? In the next blog I will address the below-the-surface issues that often manifest in problem empathy. But for now, here are some simple, but effective pointers:

• Draw your boundaries
  For some, this means re-drawing boundaries that have failed to protect. Others may never had any boundaries in the first place. Either way, it is very difficult to put correctives in place midway in the relationship between care-givers and care-receivers. But it is essential to correct any imbalance that has been allowed to set in. Frank and open conversations must take place, together with admission of faulty pastoring while establishing clear and agreed-upon new ways of doing things.
• Be willing to be disagreeable
  The word ‘no’ can be shocking to those who’ve never heard it from you before. They may respond in a highly negative manner, even accusing you of not caring and not being willing to fulfil your duty. This can be devastating to those who lean towards over-empathising. Every leader must learn to have the right level of disagreeableness, otherwise they will become weak and ineffective in ministry. Their job is not to be liked by everybody all the time. Rather, it is to lead people into God’s best for their lives, even if people do not see it at the time.
• Be prepared suffer loss in the short term
  It is almost inevitable that people will be offended at your new stance, but you must hold firm. Some will threaten you and find ways of punishing you for not meeting their expectations. Be patient with them. After all, you are partly to blame for re-enforcing those expectations in the first place, by not exposing them as unreasonable. Some will be sure to leave. After all, that’s the surest way of hitting back. But, if the leader has been clear, communicated compassionately and behaved correctly during the re-setting process, there is nothing to fear from some temporary losses. They will be far outweighed by the long term gains for both leaders and members.

In the next article, I will examine some beneath-the-surface issues by asking, ‘What do narcissistic leaders and empathic leaders have in common?’

Church Matters Series